As a child of the 90's (with its chronic high achieving millenial tendencies coupled with never feeling good enough), I always thought I was complimenting myself when I called myself a 'perfectionist.' A few years ago, my perception of the word changed, and I started to understand that 'perfectionism' is actually a toxic trait. I completed flipped, and in doing so, began to embrace and lean into failures and mistakes. I felt so good about this new version of myself, not only because it lessened the pressure and resulting stress on myself, it brought greater humility into my life. "Of course I'm not perfect, I'm only human.'
And then this week happened. Lots of downloads. Lots of channeled wisdom. Lots of tears.
Recently I've been guided to greater insight on the topic of perfection in a way that I'd never before seen or considered. As with any education, there is a series of steps and lessons that must be followed in sequence, so that you are not given more than you are able recieve. That is how my process of awakening has been, and continues to evolve. For example, what I understand this week will make sense in context of last week, but my perception of the learnings might be completely flipped by this time next week or next month or even next year.
What has been understood is thus:
Perfection as a concept, is completely different in reality from the way human beings perceive it to be. Perfection is a reflection of how a creation fulfills its purpose or function. Human beings percieve perfection as being 'without error,' but we haven't really adequately defined what 'error' is. Is error every mistake a human being makes? Well then first we must examine what a 'human being' is. A human being is really a being, functionally a physical manifestation of spirit, created for the purpose of creating (this is what it means to be created in the image of God, aka, the Creator). Therefore a human being is perfectly created to create perfectly. And are there errors in creation? Of course not. Everything created by God and the children of God is as perfect as they are (for all is an extension of God, the One, the Many).
So where did the notion of error and mistakes arise? Well, it started when human beings forgot who they really were, their true selves beyond the physical existence. For the most part, human beings identify with their egos. And egos are all about mistakes - who makes 'em, who's to blame for 'em, why they're made, how to benefit from the percieved mistakes of others, how we can punish ourselves or others for our or their mistakes, the list goes on. Egos percieve differences as errors. Egos revel in mistakes because they make their human hosts feel bad or keep them in judgement of others, which of course, keeps them separate from others. And separation - or at least, the illusion/perception of separation from God/Source/Creator - is the only thing sustaining that ego of yours. The ego loves those limiting beliefs you hold about yourself, you know, the beliefs that make you out to be small, unworthy, not good enough, not smart enough. Those limiting beliefs are what's running your operating system right now, and while you've given your power up the ego (meaning, while you identify with it rather than your true self), that's who's controlling the levers. But the ego in control of the levers isn't just operating at the individual level - this happens at the collective level as well (one has only to read the history books or look at the present state of conflict in the world). Unfortunately, there are many belief systems out there that base their whole sales package on telling people that they are dirty sinners who must repent otherwise they shall face the wrath of God. What could possibly be gained by keeping people in fear and disconnected from their true selves? Oh, wait. These same outfits also love to say that they are right and others are wrong. Classic ego, because remember, the ego loves to invent and lord over the percieved errors of others.
The truth is, there are no mistakes. There are no errors. You, Child of God, are perfect. But not only is perfection a reflection of how a creation fulfills its purpose or function, the paradox here is that contained within perfection is the perception of imperfection,
What have your so-called mistakes, errors, and failures (imperfections) led to? What did they teach you? It is unlikely that your distortions from your preferred outcomes taught you nothing. The point of being a creator is learning about how to create better, and the way you create better is by trying something, 'failing,' and going back to the drawing board. Evolution bears this out. Imperfection is the grain of sand in the oyster. It's the growth edge we must come up against in order to move past the comfort zone. It's the worm prior to moving into the cocoon. Imperfection is only a stage in your evolution, which is a circle that goes round and round and never ends. Remember, you are creating your own experience while you are incarnated here, and there will be experiences that you probably wish not to have had. However, zoomed out from the experience and observing from a higher perspective, who is to say that those distortions and imperfections haven't created the beginning of something different, perhaps something better?
You are a perfectly made creator who creates perfectly. The path to creation however, is deliciously - and necessarily - imperfect.
This week I'm being guided to take an automatic writing approach to the lesson. What follows is a transmission from wisdom beyond, specifically dealing with the providence of our creations. If there is something that you're striving for, ask yourself why you're striving for it. Whether or not you get what you desire is just one piece of the puzzle, for sometimes it's in the getting of what we want that the hardest lessons are found and (perhaps) learned.
Your intention for that which you desire is key to what may manifest in this reality (and if desire = implied lack, then therein again is further opportunity for growth).
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"How can you, who goes forth with so-called purpose and appearances, do so without shame or fear or regret, so that you in the doing, are able to construct a most wondrous reality beyond even that of your wildest imagination?
For how can one do this without sin or breach of their own humanity, to build a world of your own choosing when therein is implied a building of something for self (which may be construed as inherently selfish)?
I say unto you:
For that which is built of love, and if that building is reflective of one's inner world, then all you are doing is making manifest the glory which already resides in the temple, in the Holy of Holies, your physical self. To bring forth that which is already perfect and true, is to reside at the right hand of God. Therefore it is not selfish, so long as the world you build is righteous.
Ask yourself the following questions in pursuit of this, your ideal world:
1. Do I do this out of love of self/others, or do I do this because I am seeking love (and thus, am motivated by ego)?
2. Am I a stranger to mine own heart, and thus closed off from Source, the wellspring of love, or am I acting out of knowledge of Self and thus knowledge of mine own purpose?
3. Do I bring a childlike enthusiasm to the doing/creating, rooted in love/joy and thus abundant in love/joy, or do I bring eagerness, cynicism, fear, and scarcity to the doing such that the doing is really a reflection of a personal kind of hell?
In all things in heaven and earth, of creation and within and without, there must be one motivation - such that it isn't a motivation at all but that through which you move effortlessly - and that is love.
If you are a fish, love is the water in which you swim. As a human being, it is the air you breathe. For the plants, it is the sun and soil which nourishes and provides space to grow. Love is that which binds you through eternity to Source, to God, however you might call that which created heaven and earth and everything, everywhere, throughout all time and space and outside of that realm unto infinity. But even this limits both God and love, for truly there is no adequate language with which to express the meaning of either. Not that in your limited human experience you could ever truly know the One or the Many, though you may if you put aside your human consciousness and enter into your timeless nature through the sacred entry point of your heart.
And so as you venture into the world, as you create your personal universe, ask yourself if that which lives inside of you is a heaven or a hellscape, for that is what will manifest on the outside. If love be that which dwells within, then love be that which dwells without."
